Your love song resonates in me.

"Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body."- 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 One of the goals I am making with some of my best friends is to stop listening to secular music for a week and listen to only Christian music and see how it affects us. We were hanging out, listening to music on the radio like we always do and we realized that Niki Minaj, or “Rack City” were probably not the best things to be listing to espicasllly when were are trying to be set apart from the “normal teenager” and worship God with everything EVEN OUR MUSIC! Like Jesus said our bodies are a temple, so we have to watch what we put in it. I know from expiearence that if I start listening to music that I know I shouldn’t, it takes my mind away from the truth and what Gods word tells me. ANYWAYS, today I started my day off by listening to worship music while I was getting ready for school, and I’m telling you it really makes a difference in my attitude towards everything. I did my work, I did not complain, it has just been all around a great day! Thank you Jesus! The song I listened to this morning was called “resonates”. My favorite part of the song is when it says “Your love song resonates in me”. Just like today, meditating on those words helped me so much to direct my thought and decisions towards Him! Yeah, this is definitely not normal, and I am completely ok with that.

You control me like a marionette.

Give my life to God, live only for God and let go of my own wants. Do things how He wants them to be done and let go of my habits. After coming home from an even as spiritual as ATF, and being around people who want the same things as me is amazing. It’s a big help to have other believers on the same page as you and wanting to live out their faith.  Why I find living for Jesus so challenging is because I’m covered in chains or puppet strings like a marionette. All my strings and chains are what are keeping me from experiencing God to the fullest, keeping me from getting closer to him. I am my biggest problem, I always want to do stupid things that I think are good ideas at the time, or will satisfy me but me just keep doing the same things over and over with the same result. Emptiness. For example, Guys. It’s like a drug to get a guy to say I’m pretty or accept me for who I am. You know, like the millions of romance movies out there about the perfect guy who treats you amazing and puts you above everything else. Well me wanting that love from someone led me to change myself thinking that I was not good enough. My clothes, my hair, my makeup the way I dress, where I shop, how I talk, even to compromise what I believe in and become a fake person. It’s like whenever I start feeling sad or depressed I immediately go back to those stupid guys who really could care less! I put all this time and effort into morphing what I wanted people to think about me. Always a fail, every time. Another one of my strings are laziness, and not wanting to do anything. In school partiructaly, I always put off my work and never do it. For whatever the reason may be like I feel like it’s too hard or I simply would rather be doing something else. Something else stupid for that matter, I put things off. The point is I want to Worship Jesus with everything that I do. With school, my friends, the music I listen to, the way I treat people, with the way I dress.  Colossians 3:23 says,” Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.”  Dear God please cut these strings and unbound these chains so I can live completely for you and find freedom from bondage.

What this is all about.

This weekend I went to an even called “Acquire the Fire”. It’s a retreat for youth and young adults. It is basically like church to the 100^th power. It’s extremely fun; there is amazing worship, dramas, concerts, workshops, speakers, comedians and spending time with friends. ATF never fails to be amazing, and life changing. I have been going for the past three years, and the main theme for this year was “Normal is not enough”. Every year I learn so much, and feel so connected with God. It’s a spiritual high every time, and it never fails to suck coming back home to normal life. The high goes away and I start feeling like crap and weighed down again. This year I want to stay connected with God and Start really living for him and give him my life as he gave me his.

You might ask. “What’s wrong with being normal?” Well normal is just blending in and doing what everyone else is doing. Because I clame to be a Christian Jesus says to us that he wants to make us holy through him. Holy means to be set apart and to be separated form the rest. Well normal is not going to be enough for me anymore. I don’t want to be another weak person who does not let their beliefs change them. I want to give God all of me and live only for him. I have been living for myself for way to long now, and I have done nothing but fail over and over trying to fill this void I feel, this emptiness that a need to fill. I’m tired of feeling alone. I want to experience the only thing that will ever fully satisfy me. Jesus Christ.  I’m going to blog about what happens, and my feelings about letting go of myself and journeying through God’s Word. Letting go of the normal and standing out.